My Home Is the Darkness
by Sesshomarusama3
Summary: Karai finds that no matter where she goes, no matter where she hides, she was going to hurt someone…she was going to hurt them all…If only she could control it. (One-Shot, LeoXKarai short fic, I OWN NOTHING. Takes place in the 2012 verse just after Vengeance is Mine)


**A/N: HI ALL! Back from my Holiday which was AWESOME! So as a little treat (and apology) here's something I posted on tumblr for TMNT GIRL POWER WEEK some time ago. I really liked what I did with this one, and I hope you do to. This is a One-Shot fic for now, but if you guys think I can extend on it, then please go ahead and offer some ideas as to how I can continue!** **Also, this is my first time writing in first person, so tell me how you think I did!**

**I OWN NOTHING!**

**Enjoy!**

**(P.S: I WILL update No Love is Greater, ****_after _****I update Oz 2 for Pen-Woman! I promised her! Also, I'll be going back and fixing up Secret Of the Ooze again, because LORD KNOWS it needs some fixing!)**

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**My Home Is the Darkness**

Two weeks.

It's been two full weeks of isolation, pain and so much confusion since that night. That night where everything had gone wrong.

The night where Shredder turned me into…_this_.

Sighing heavily to myself, though it sounded more like a testy hiss through these new fangs of mine, I slithered my way across the damp rooftops, my keen, unblinking eyes scouring every corner, picking up every detail even in the pitch darkness of the typical New York night, searching for anywhere dry enough for me to take shelter under, or something I could possibly snack on. The thought of eating another bird or a mouse – especially _rats_ – sickened me to the very core. But if I was gonna survive out here, there were things I just couldn't avoid…especially in this form.

Sliding to a stop on a secluded warehouse, I looked down at my hand…or, head, or whatever the heck it was supposed to be. My now jade eyes narrowed as much as they could with no real eyelids as I glared down at the freaky appendage.

I was _hideous_. I was a _freak_. I…wasn't really even a real mutant.

Technically, with this strange ability that I had to revert back and forth from my serpent form and my human form, I guessed I was just like April in a way; not really human, but not really mutant either. Though of course, at least the little princess could actually _control_ her powers. There were moments during both day and night were I would suddenly revert back to human and to snake again without any warning, and it hurts every single time. It was as if whatever was in that mutagen I was dropped in had a mind of its own, or something.

And to make matters worse, whenever I saw something that looked even remotely like food, my mind would go blank. Or, my human mind that is, leaving only the reptile to take over my thoughts and desires…and I wouldn't know what I'd done until it was already in my mouth, limp, bloody, and lifeless…

Letting my head dangle from the edge of the rooftop, I sighed again, ignoring the painful rumbling of my extended stomach as I watched lazily as cars drove by on the ever moving streets of this vast, ignorant city, people minding their own business as usual, a blue turtle jumping over the rooftops in the distance –

Wait…_blue turtle_?

My eyes widened, and my breath hitched in my throat as I looked up from the street below and focused solely on the moving figure only a few blocks away from where I'd settled. There he was, the leader in blue, the hero in the half shell, leaping over the rooftops with that same grace and fluidity that I'd seen so many times before, back when we were enemies. I couldn't help but smirk at the memory. He never did give up on me, did he? Always thinking that I was good on the inside and all that junk.

In the end, I guess he was right…in a way. But it didn't matter. The 'goodness inside me' didn't stop me from going after Shredder. And despite how hard he tried to stop me, how hard they _all _tried, even the whole family couldn't save me from turning into _this_.

I watched unmoving as he finally slowed to a stop and sat down on a water tower several buildings away from me, his legs dangling over the edge as he looked down at his lap. I continued to stare as he heaved a heavy sigh. My head tilted. He looked so sad…oh no, he wasn't blaming himself for this whole mess now, was he? I knew he had a tendency to do that to himself when he though he'd failed his team. But right now, he was alone. Well, if you could count me staring at him from another building company, but other than that, he was on his own

…he was _defenseless_…

_…he was __**delicious**__…_

I couldn't stop it. No matter how hard I fought against it, no matter how much I tried to convince myself that he wasn't food, he was my friend, my _only_ friend in the whole world right now that still believed in me, it took over me. Once again, my human mind vanished, and my pupils dilated.

There was only the animal now. And it was hungry for turtle…

_Silently, I slithered swiftly across the rooftops with boundless haste, my ravenous eyes never leaving the slumped figure of the turtle as I moved closer and closer, until I was directly beneath him. His shell was facing me, so he never saw me approaching. Perfect. Stretching my elongated reptilian body, I raised myself upwards so that I was looking down at him. He still didn't turn around, even as I loomed over him. I opened my jaws, my fangs growing longer as I prepared to take a bite..._

_His body suddenly stiffened as he felt my breath upon his neck, and he slowly turned. His eyes seemed to bulge out as he let out a scream, before leaping backwards off the water tower just as my jaws snapped closed where his head had been seconds previous. Outraged, I hissed at him as I slid my way over to him in a heartbeat, attempting to trap him in my coils, desperate to feast. But again, he leapt away from me. _

_Was he running from me? No, if he was, he would have done so already; I wasn't that fast in this form, so he knew I wouldn't be able to keep up with no legs. No, he wasn't running…he was just _evading_ my strikes. _

_He had no intention of going anywhere._

_His lips were moving, and his expression was scared and pleading, but I heard nothing but the sound of muffled words as I swerved my body in one swift motion and struck again with my tail, my attack making its mark on his face as he stumbled backwards. He shakily stood up, pressing his hand against his stinging cheek. I seized my opportunity, and before he could move again, I wrapped my body around him, locking his arms to his sides as my coils trapped him and began to squeeze the air from his lungs. I hissed at him as he fought to break free and to breathe, but I tightened my grip, and he let out a strangled cry of pain. I felt grim satisfaction as his eyes rolled into the back of his head as he began to lose consciousness. _

_He was my prey. Prey was not going anywhere. Must feast. Must kill. Must -_

"K-Karai…" he stuttered breathlessly, "p-please…Miwa…"

_My eye twitched. What was that? Did he say -?_

_Miwa…_

_Father…_

_Family…_

_Leonardo…_

Leonardo? Oh no! Oh god _**no**_!

Like a light-bulb flashing on in the dark, I returned to myself again, just as Leo's body became limp, falling unconscious completely in my coils. With a sharp gasp, I forced my body to relax, and I dropped him to the roof again, watching guiltily as he coughed and gasped for air for a few moments, his body curling up as the coughs wracked through him, before he went still again, his breaths coming out in strained wheezes. I sighed in relief; he was still breathing…

What have I done? I hurt him again. Why did I have to ruin everything and hurt everyone I cared about?

Including my real family…

Narrowing my eyes angrily, I dipped my head down and focused. _Hard_. I forced my body to change, to morph back into a girl again…the girl that he'd never given up on. It hurt _so_ much, and it made me feel weak, but within minutes I managed it. Now with two legs again, I toppled to my hands and knees as I panted heavily, beads of sweat dripping from my forehead from the strain. Man, that was painful, but at least now, I had complete control over my transformation.

Well, for _now_. Who knows when I'll turn back again.

After getting my breathing under control again, I lifted my head to look at the prone form of Leonardo, still lying motionless on the ground. He hadn't moved an inch since I released him, and part of me feared he was dead. But then I noticed his chest moving up and down steadily, which put my fears at ease. Flexing my numbed fingers, I slowly reached out and put a hand against Leo's cheek, my thumb stroking it gently. He still didn't move at my touch.

Biting down on my lip, I felt tears stinging my eyes, though I hated it with a passion that I let a single one fall as I stared down at him, but I made no move to wipe it away. This was all my fault. _Everything_ was my fault. If only I'd listened to my fathers' words, if I'd just _stayed away _from Shredder, none of this would've ever happened.

I had to stay away. Until I could get this mutation under control, I couldn't go near them ever again.

Taking my hand off his cheek for a moment, I took his T-Phone from his belt and punched in the emergency speed-dial that Donatello had shown me back at their lair, when he'd planned to give me my own T-Phone…before I'd gone and screwed everything up. I simply let it blink as I set it down near Leo's hand, making it look as if he'd dropped it moments before passing out or something.

I heard Raph's voice on the other line, sounding concerned at first. But then when he started to panic when he didn't get an answer, I widened my eyes. I'd never heard him sound so scared before. I knew that behind that tough guy exterior there was something more, and I wondered how long I'd have to wait in order to see it, but now…it scared me. To think that the so-called 'badass' of the group could sound so afraid if someone he cared about was in trouble…

And it was because of _me_.

Averting my attention from the phone, I cast Leo one last look, letting my hand cup his cheek one more time. Just one more time. "…I'm sorry…" I'm _so _sorry." I whispered to him, before standing up, turning on my heel and running away like the coward I was, across the rooftops and into the night.

There was no turning back now. Once all was said and done, I didn't belong with them or anyone anymore.

The darkness was my home now. And despite the cold and the lonely emptiness, I welcomed myself home.

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**A/N: Well, that was rather depressing. I hope you liked it! R&R please!**


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